Disequilibrium

Written by the pupils of St Joseph's Convent School, the Elvian School, Downe House School, and Garth Hill College

The snow was melting, icicles dripping and patches of green emerging. I looked over to where the snowman had stood but something else had taken its place. A cloud of what looked like mist was now there. Except it was no ordinary mist; it was more dense and colourless. Dashes of grey flecks swirled about it like a sea mist, yet more meaningless.
It was late evening now, and splashes of red and yellow spilled across the sky, though the street below was a light shade of black.
As I watched the strange cloud, it merged together to form a small human child shape, whom I instantly recognised. I knew he was my younger brother, who died from the black plague at the tender age of six.
He wore white rags and his skin was pale and sickly. His faded brown hair hung loosely around his prominent cheek bones. Although all these features were strange, the one which really caught my eye was his jet black eyes. They were completely black and had no iris or whites. As I looked closely at him, his eyes mesmerized me, like an endless pit of sorrow.
The light was fading and his characteristics were becoming less distinctive. I quickly turned to get a candle which flickered dimly beside my bed. I turned back with candle in hand. Peered through the window and saw he had vanished leaving only faint footprints in the melting snow. The footprints were leading up to my front door.
Suddenly, my candle flickered and went out. The door slammed I heard a faint eerie voice, echoing around my room.
"My death was not a coincidence Martha. It was meant to be and now the black plague infests your body. Your days are numbered. A mysterious fate is catching up with you for the misdeeds you showed to me. You will receive a sign but you can avert this fate if you change your ways!"
I felt a cold wind brush past me and my candle was lit once again. I could hear no sounds. Just a deadly silence, haunting me.

The next day I woke up with hardly any recollection of the incident that took place last night. Was it a dream? A fragment of my imagination? Or a reality that was just too unusual for me to understand. All of a sudden horrible memories flashed in my mind of when my brother was alive his last few days of when he was healthy. I thought of all the ghastly things that I had taught him, the way I had misguided him and taught him to do wrong.’ A mysterious fate is catching up with you for the misdeeds you showed me.’ My brother's words circled around my mind, I could not make sense of them.
I felt like I was going insane, I needed to get out of the house. I hurriedly threw off my night gown and slipped in to my pinafore. I hurtled myself down the stairs, grabbing my cloak as I went.
The north breeze swept threw the street and into my body, I could feel my mind returning to its normal state. I walked on down the street towards the market, my mind was at ease and I felt relaxed.
The hustle and bustle of bodies running around at the market was reassuring and I slowly returned to my daily routine. I walked past glancing at all the stalls .It felt like people were staring at me like I was some sort of freak. I could hear voices in my mind whispering at me from every direction.
I couldn’t take it, were the voices in my head or were they real? "Stop it "I screamed, I could feel tears welling up in my eyes, "leave me alone! Why are you doing this?!" I was shaking, confusion swirling around in my mind. I didn’t know what to do , where to go, so I ran. I ran down the street, my heart thudding, my feet pounding against the ground. Where I was going, I didn’t know , I just kept running until I could not go any further, my chest was heaving uncontrollably, I looked around me, I was in the church yard.
There, straight in front of me, was my brother’s grave. I slumped down on to it and let out an almighty sob. ’Why, why are you doing this. I don’t understand!’
I lay there, sobbing, whispering through the ground to my brother’s dead cold body. I don’t know how long I was there for, but I could feel my eyes becoming heavy, and my vision blurring until all I could see was darkness.

 I woke with the sun shining brightly in my eyes. A pigeon cooed in the distance and the frosted ground was hard beneath my stiffened body. I stared around. I tried to shout but the words did not seem to come out. I started to panic. I felt as though someone had stitched my lips together.

I stood up and brushed off the bits of snow that had fallen on me during the night. It had covered me like a dusting of icing sugar. I still remembered my brother’s words. My mind, my life, my fate and what I had done to my brother haunted me. I knew all along I had led Joe astray. I knew what terrible things I had made him do and say. Suddenly it came flooding back to me from a distant memory… We were standing on the street. I was talking to him. We were just two children standing innocently together. I heard my voice saying convincingly to Joe, ‘Go quickly and fetch father’s gun. I want to show you something.’

My brother willingly agreed and ran off. A tingle of excitement ran through my veins. He brought back the gun a minute later, carrying it on his feeble shoulders and smiling. I taught him how to fire it and told him there were no bullets in it. A boy suddenly appeared with a group of friends. They all sat down on the bench and started playing marbles. ‘Hey Joe, just for fun, that boy could be your pretend target! Try shooting at him, ’ I said. ‘Just pull the trigger – it’s easy.’

‘I don’t want to!’ cried Joe.

‘Stop being such a baby, Joe,’ I said, sniggering at him.

Joe’s fingers gripped around the trigger.

There was a bang, and silence.

I returned to reality, and the pigeon flew away.